maddy

how true all those  two letter words make sense ,,if it is to be it is up to me and know one else to make my choice and own up to what i do  to myself and for myself, can notblame knowone but me..

why!!

small word,big meaning..

sometimes  hard to answer?

..you know what that means,,time to change it up…to remind myself to recommit to my intentions,.why?

I hear it/see it….i acknowledge i have a weight issue,..i hear people say .oh my you put on weight since i last seen you..

think………….

feel…….what it makes me feel like..

1.fat

2.ugly.unattractive.

3.worthless.

4.unhealthy

5..and the list goes on..

so now what am i going to do about it?

 TIME TO  CHANGE..take a new road .

sorry this doesnt seem like a blog maybe a dose of psychology for me to hear share and do it,,  for my own kick in the ass, to motivate myself,..if it helps others well i am happy

1.pay attention

2.speak the truth

3.be responsilble for your experience(be accountable.

4.ask for what you want.

5.keep your agreements.

6.strive to keep value in all things.

p.s remember ..”if you  do what you’ve always done,you’ll get what you’ve always got”

  .. to update you all,,   on friday mike and i got engaged… i  wanted to share with all  my buddies and the world,, why we been mia for a few days ,, but unfortunately..we were no help this week to the teams we are on for the weight lose challenge but we are certainly going to chime in this week and do our share,,  we have not had the chance to catch up,, but as soon as my head comes down from the clouds i will catch up on all the mail you been sending!! hope you all had a great week,.. 

how true that sounds,, i never really  paid much attention to many things around me that haven’t had any direct effect on me, well i always new i was blossoming and growing bigger by the year but never really seen it in a picture for myself and said wow,, i never really new exactly what iwas  doing to myself..

well maybe i was just in denial,, well its easy to make excuses for myself , and now i been really searching outside myself and learning about what triggers me and  as hard as it is, i see habits i never really paid much attention like a sneak bite here and there never counting it, and how many other things do we just do and never acknowledge we are doing it at all.

i think that if i get anything from this buddy slim system it certainly makes me think, and be more conscious of my decision, be more aware of the moment, and being proactive in my life and not react.. i have so many things i want in life and i am the one to make a choice, i read my own blogs from day one i started and the heading are in the moment feelings, i am  the one who makes my own choices and when i have a  good day!! i did that, and when i make excuses i do that!! and  i need to take control and be real with myself and don’t butter things up and own it,, i am the only one who  knows what it is i want for myself,, i can share it, but i am the one  who has to  own up to it and be accoutable for my action and my life,, i think  its taking baby steps and everyday i see  myself doing something better for my life.. fat free proofing the house, getting a new scale, buying new walking sneakers and  blogging my feelings helps kind of make s a relief of emotions,   a good feeling to get it out,,so i may not be loosing weight as i would like, but rome wasn’t built in a day! so my ticker will move one day but for now i am doing what it takes to get it straight..

GOOD MORNING!Well thanks to our shining stardawn,gave me the inspiration to write this blog this a.m. a beautiful crisp cold morning here  in long island , where life is good in the warm weather,and walking weather is for all kinds of weather,

have a real exciting week coming up,  just alot of things to do,,and I have the power, to take  the reigns back and put the excuses away this week,.  mike and are have been doing this journey together, and even though  his body allows him to cheat  a little more then mines does, i need  to plan my cheat nights and everything else for that matter.i don’t know why i make it so hard for myself , i learned enough tools to loose a thousand lbs, its putting the  want into it,,

so i have all my tools out the house is stocked with all the good things ,,,, even healthy things to snack on.. i have my  journal out becasue believe it or not the journal is my diary and was always a golden key to my success in the past, so being here with all you actually made it like i  have journal with a actual response.. just wish you can do it for me,,, but i know God helps those who help themselves..and its real nice  adding our own experience if it helps to someone out there,

well i wanted to mention that we started a big looser at work and well the anti at the  end which was suppose to be april but they decided to extend it so at the end it will probably about 800$ we add 10$ each pay check which is every 2 weeks and well if i put my mind to it  i can do it…

and with a cheering section like slim buddy  it makes the journey fun..

so we are going to start doing some home projects and you know when that happens your to  busy to think of food, and when you start one thins ladies,,you know  what happens then!! everything must go and everything new  is what we want,, so here we go !!OUT WITH THE OLD IN WITH THE NEW!!

have a great week everyone,,and as a wise person just said to me !!

YOU HAVE THE POWER!! and im a control freak!! hehe

I CAN”T FIGUR IT OUT!!ok this is it,, i am getting a little fustrated with this blog  and i seem to do it everytime i blog,,, what am i slow or something I CANT FIGURE IT OUT!!i wrote it all out just like i wanted and well,,,, poof off again into cyber space… lord knows, those alliens must say what the hell is wrong with that women!! well anyway, like i was saying  i  love thos character pictures and sparkle pictures every now and then i see one and would love to send  one back,, but I CAN”T FIGURE IT OUT!!

just like those poor buddies who request        to be put on my list ……..i said yes but as you heard before  i reply and accept and poof there gone, into cyber space once again!!

so for all of you who were here and gone   come back again,,,and by then maybe i would have figured it out.

i love this little corner of the world where we can chew the fat and not get our feelings hurt and share life experince form the heart and  feel accepted,it really has put a twist  on dieting this time, hearing about everyones success and gains,,,,,hmmmmm wonder who that is!! as if you can’t figure that out.... well  maybe i will figure it our this week,i promised one of my buddies i am going to do that and even though you can’t see me !! GOD CAN,, and i am afraid of him,,, maybe next week you will see a little less of me ,, literally speaking,, because i have seen anything  move on my weight ticker in a while.. so havea  awesome weekend everyone and i am sorry this is not exactly how i wrote my last blog, but i will figure it out,,

.well if i don’t have one excuse after another.. todays excuse was the scale don’t work,

yesterdays was, oh,,i was sick and need to nourish myself..

the day before was.. oh a little won’t kill me.. well i surely could give you a good excuse if you need one.. but as far as advice,,sorry maybe next week, i am in the complaint department this week..gees..i didn’t think i was that bad.. and well i probably ate one to many weight watchers cakes,,   probably till it wasnt a weight watchers anymore,, well next week  is another week,,oops there i go again putting it off,, i mean tommorow is another day,, and well mike lost another two lbs,, men!!!its pressure dieting with a man  they seem to just have life by the balls..

well enough of this i am going to bed all.. of me,,..and start this challenge again,.. i need to go and get my lips sewed shut….all of them.. that will make mike suffer…hehe bad girl..that will show him to loose more weight then me.. actually we both have the same problem..can’t say no…and we love to eat

…..gees i need to wake up today for some reason i am so sleepy, and well i managed to drag myself through the day, and realized…i didn’t even drink one glass of water, i hate days like that,,when you take what you need and  don’t even bother to do what you planned.

well i must be fighting off something because mike has what i have been fighting all day long, must be the bug,,,yuck..

well just watched oprah about clutter and how real is she,, clutter free your home and get rid of what you don’t use, if you need to think of it get rid of it..

well i been saying i need to clean out my closet and get rid of some clthes i have from size 10 up to size 22..and believe me. i complain about not having closet space.. go figure,

and everyone does havea room we always yell when someone knocks on the door to “shut the bedroom door”..well anyway, i always feel so much on top of the game when i  start everything fresh and clean, and well prepared,

like when i start a new  diet, i clean out the cabinets and get everything i need , clean out the refidge and stock it healthy, and well i suppose, keeping it simple stupid..is the motto,,sometimes i am the one who makes myself crazy.

i am going to go  through everyone room one by one,,anyone need clothes.. size 12-20.hehe..i suppose i was wishful thinking keeping those clothes..and if you don’t see me for a while.. i am in a room somewhere..